If you haven’t already figured this one out, country folk are altogether better than city folk. Just ask them.
This is exactly what I did this morning as I sat at Coffee Dominion, opposite my father and director of O’Shea and Dyer Lawyers Townsville.
Unlike most country folk, Ivan Baxter has sadly adapted to some elements of the city slicker lifestyle. The first being his attraction to hipster coffee shops. My favourite coffee is coffee I don’t have to pay for, so I’m really not complaining.
Regardless of this downfall, Ivan has held onto many golden nuggets from his bush baby upbringing.
And I thought it my divine duty to share them with you.
“So Ivan, why are country folk altogether better than city folk?” I asked politely.
"Some city folk come to the outback, don't know what to do in a survival situation and pay the ultimate price. Some even die!" he responded with true blue charm.
“Oh fantastic. That didn’t quite answer my question but that’s ok as it was funny. Anyway, how would you best describe a city slicker, Ivan?”
“A saltwater croc, young Alex. Pure and simple. I’ll tell you what, if there’s one animal you wouldn’t want to meet in a dark alley it’s a salt water croc. Fortunately, they don’t live in dark alleys, preferring salt water instead.”
“Oh, I quite like that metaphor wise Ivan.”
“Quite the fan myself, my little ankle biter. Quick fact: As their name implies saltwater crocs are found in salt water, but they are also found in fresh water, which is not what their name implies. It just goes to show, they’re not to be trusted.”
Ivan Baxter didn’t actually say any of this. I’d like to think he’s a little more astute in the literary department.
Actually, in the spirit of coming clean, all of the above quotes are copied from Russell Coight’s ‘Important Aussie Lessons’ Buzzfeed article. I’ve been telling furphies.
And as unethical as that sounds, they all ring true.
Born in Charlie’s Trousers (Charter’s Towers) and raised in Abergowrie, Ivan is your classic concrete cowboy; evidence that small town, local Townsville Law firms are better than the high rise, city slickin’ solicitors who are in the game for the fame.
With over 30 years of experience and a case of small-town devotion, O’Shea and Dyer Townsville Lawyers are committed to helping the people of far North Queensland with quality, affordable legal services.
This time, straight from the mouth of the man himself and inspired by the local lingo of his hometown Charter’s Towers: “If your lawyer isn’t wearing RM Williams, they’re about as welcome in my territory as a fart in a spacesuit.”